CW

It is hard to believe I am where I am today. 20 years ago, I was considering Catholic priesthood. Today, I’m preparing to become a Jew-yes, a Jew.

The human journey to God is fortuitous, circuitous, and full of serendipity. These ideas are nothing new. I can remember reading Thomas Merton’s The Seven Storey Mountain in high school and being amazed at how Merton ended up where he was and what a real part of his life God was. I wanted that sort of journey with God. It is a journey I have nurtured. It is the journey that has brought me to this important decision.

Friends ask me why. It is funny; I grew up in a non-religious home. My parents divorced when I was four, weren’t anti-religious, but they just weren’t particularly religious either. To some extent, they were ambivalent about religion. My grandmother began taking me to a Baptist church with her when I was 9 or 10. I eventually joined the church and was baptized. Later, I joined the Catholic Church. My journey to God continued as a Franciscan friar for a period of time.

After getting married, my wife and I practiced Catholicism. There was a huge gap for us. The gap was especially huge for me. We essentially stopped attending church. I had begun questioning the faith of my upbringing. At some point I decided it wasn’t worth the effort.

There are moments in one’s life that challenge and provoke. There have been many of those in my life. God has called more often than I have been willing to answer. The rumblings in my soul toward Judaism have not been contented to placation. I have slowly learned about Judaism and with each passing day and each new piece of knowledge, I have realized that I cannot ignore the rumbling. I began the online conversion course in 2008; it took me about 16 months to complete. I have taken my time by looking at the faith of my upbringing under the lens of Torah.

Much of my life has been driven by a sense of justice and rightness. The Jewish values of Chesed, Rachamin and Tzedakah are ones I find both appealing and persuasive. Some place I heard Tzedakah described as “righteous charity” which spoke to me at a deep level. It is easy to give money, which I do. It is much more difficult to give time, energy, support. The idea that charity is an expected part of one’s life is important to me. Taking care of the less fortunate, having compassion for the vulnerable are important.

Trying to describe how one religion is a better fit than another is difficult. Judaism feels right on multiple levels. In fact, the word feel doesn’t adequately describe why Judaism is right for me. Judaism is more than a religion; it is being a Jew. I remember a rabbi describing to me one time the concept of mishpokche, a Yiddish word which literally means extended family. The meaning, though, is more significant than that.
The word connotes a profound connectedness and refers to the interconnectedness of the Jewish people. Judaism challenges the Jew on all levels. It is right for me to be challenged intellectually and emotionally. Judaism integrates the human experience in a way that other traditions don’t.

Friday nights and Saturdays have become less hectic. While I live a good distance from a synagogue, I try as often as possible to attend Shabbat morning services. While they are not well attended, I have enjoyed the informal, almost conversational nature, of the service. The rabbi engages the congregants in a dialogue. I am moving toward a kosher diet, which is easy since I don’t eat meat. I am paying more attention to what I eat and to what I am purchasing. I imagine my home life will continue to change. Holidays and festivals will become a bigger part of my life.

I think one of the most important parts of being a Jew is in being a Jew. What I mean by that is that a Jew should identify with the larger Jewish community. I find myself being engaged in synagogue activities. Sometimes it is merely emailing the rabbi or other members I have gotten to know. Other times, I participate in synagogue activities. On a larger scale, I find I am redefining how I view Israel. I have never been anti-Israel but I also know I haven’t really thought about the issues in Israel and the Middle East. I am grappling with those issues and what it means to be in solidarity with the people of Israel.

Tzedakah is one of the most important values to me. I intend on fulfilling this mitzvah in a number of ways. I will donate my time and money to worthy causes. I will also be involved in the synagogue in some tangible way.

I am committed to prayer. I have been reciting the shema in English. I am memorizing the Hebrew. I am observing Shabbat candle lighting. I attend Shabbat services. I am spending Shabbat in reflection and study rather than using the day for errands, shopping, and busyness.

I would like to continue my studies in Judaism by continuing to read and journal. I would like to learn Hebrew and be able to read Hebrew. Eventually, I would like to travel to Israel. I have looked at classes offered by the Jewish Community Center in Atlanta. While Atlanta is a good distance away, with some planning I may be able to participate in some learning opportunities. Finally, I want to experience other forms of Jewish life. I would like to visit an Orthodox synagogue, for example. The more I learn, the more people I meet and get to know, I will become a better member of the Jewish community and people.